“Relationships.” Now there’s a tricky word.
4 syllables.
13 letters.
5 vowels.
8 consonants.
1 goal: LOVE.
So, why are they so hard? If we all just want love, shouldn’t it be as easy as telling your significant other what you’re looking for and then, boom, you can hit the ground running?
WRONG. Rarely is it that simple.
There’s an understood though uncommonly spoken about rule, or ratio. It involves three key factors, and on these factors all relationships are founded. Looks, personality, and the X FACTOR. The initial attraction that seeds all healthy romantic relationships is founded on at least two of these factors—i.e. you’re attracted to someone’s looks and personality. That’s the classic combo (the “ace in the hole”).
Sometimes attraction will be based on personality and the X FACTOR—i.e. meh looks, personable as hell, and their dad is Bruce Willis. This is not the ideal combination for a relationship, but hey, Bruce Willis as a potential in-law?…let’s see where this can go. Relationships that begin with a heavy leaning on the X FACTOR are known as “wild cards.” They’re obviously a gamble but, oh how satisfying they are when they actually work!
The least preferred form of attraction is the “all in on ace high.” A relationship can’t thrive with only one key point of attraction. A beautiful face cannot make up for a violent streak. And e-zoo tickets aren’t nearly enough of a reason to see something through when there are no other foundations for a relationship.
While it’s easy enough to know why you might pursue a relationship with another individual (ideally a 45/45/10 combo of physical, emotional, and X FACTOR), there is likely to be some initial awkwardness on the first few dates. This is normal.
The best thing to do in a new relationship is to have open and honest communication.
The last thing you want to do is waste each other’s time. So, in order to streamline the process and meld strong foundations in all relationships, we’ve designed a Rubric, much like the kind that teachers would use to rank your performance for giving a speech. Basically, it’s a pie chart that you can present directly to your boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other to state in no uncertain terms exactly why you’re with them.
You’ll never have to wonder if someone is only interested in you for your long lashes, chiseled jawline, or ability to obtain access to the set of M. Night Shyamalan’s GLASS or the new Die Hard movie. You’ll have the meticulously calculated data right in front of you.
We recommend both members of the relationship exchange these useful Rubrics as early as possible into the relationship.
Just finding this now and already been with your significant other happily for several years? No worries—the Attraction Rubric makes an awesome anniversary or Valentine’s Day present.
Later,
Stephen G. Erickson, Co-Founder & Part-Time Intern
