What does and does not qualify as “art” is especially strange.
I think most people would agree with the idea that anything evocative of emotion would qualify as “art.”
By this logic, however innocent it may seem, putting an animal out of its misery with a shovel would be considered “art.”
This sets a very dangerous precedent.
Suddenly, people will start flocking to the streets in herds, canvassing the neighborhood in their Priuses, scouring the land for animals that can be put out of their misery.
“Oh, look! I got eyes on a dog with a limp. Pull over, quick!”
“Orphaned deer with no parents—dead ahead! (laughter) DEAD ahead! Get it?! Cause it’s about to BE dead! Get ready to say ‘hi’ to your mother for me, Bambi!”
“I got a bird that can’t fly—left side! Put my window down so I can take the shot! (pause) Put my window down now—it’s gonna run away! (pause) What do you mean the window isn’t working?! We got this thing serviced, like, last week! Didn’t you tell them about the window? (pause) What?! I reminded you week after week for the last 6 months. (pause) No, no no—you told me every time, ‘honey, it’s fine—I’ll get it fixed,’ and I kept telling you, ‘baby, please don’t forget, or we’re gonna be in a pinch someday with a window that won’t open,’ and what did you say? You said, “stop nagging.” Now look where we are. This is what I get when I don’t nag. I get a window that WON’T OPEN and a husband that does NOT do what he is told. Fu*k it, I’ll have to use the sunroof!”
These lunatics will consider themselves artists, and they’ll brush over their violent tendencies, claiming their actions are nothing more than “artistic expression.”
I don’t know, kid. I really don’t know.
We need to sit down one day, as a society, with the sole agenda of banging out a definitive standard to determine what IS and IS NOT art on a go-forward basis.
I don’t think we’ll ever be able to really sit back and relax until we clear this up for everybody. We might not actively be thinking about the fact that nobody knows what “art” really is, but I have a theory that we’re all subconsciously in a state of total agony, primarily because “art” is such a subjective term in its current state, yet we’re too lazy to take an afternoon to pound out a firm definition.
Fix this.
Fix this NOW.
NOW, I said.
Until next time,
Michael J. Erickson, CEO & Co-Founder
